Four Years Ago

Four years ago sometime in the late morning I made a phone that I could have never dreamed of making, especially not at 27 years old.

I called Luke to tell him I had breast cancer. We'd just gotten back from vacation in Iowa and he had no time off to be at the dr's office with me that morning. My mom was there. She sat at the round table with me holding Micah for about two hours or so while we listened intently learning about my diagnosis and what was to come.

When I called him he was in the car. I don't really remember much about the conversation other than I had to choke the words out and we both said we'd see each other and talk when he got home.

That afternoon I was sitting in my spot on the couch. There was a TV tray in front of me with my then current staple, A&W root beer. I was addicted during my pregnancy and while breast feeding. Thankfully, it's caffeine free because I certainly drank my fair share!

When Luke walked into the house, there was the most awkward silence. I'm sure neither of us had a clue what to say or do. He walked over to give me a hug and knocked my root beer over.

That was probably the best thing that could've happened. Such a serious, difficult moment interrupted by something so trivial and silly. We just laughed and cleaned up the spilled root beer. Eventually we got around to hugging and talking about our new reality.

I asked him to take some pics of Micah and me that night. I was/am usually the one behind the camera, and I knew that day that it wouldn't be long before I no longer looked like myself. I wanted as many before chemo pics as possible.

The camera must have been on some strange setting because unfortunately, most from that day aren't great, but I'm so glad I have them!

See the white, orange and yellow towel in the floor? That's where the root beer was. :-)

And today. With two amazing boys, one of which I probably wouldn't have had I not gone through cancer. 

As I say every year, Happy Cancerversary to me!!

So thankful that God is bigger than my cancer!!

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