I Didn't Want to Homeschool

I never thought I'd homeschool. In fact, I've said to several people in the last few months that if you'd have asked me just a year ago if I'd consider homeschooling, I'd have looked at you like you had seven heads.

I adore my children and love and cherish the time I'm able to spend with them but until recently longed for the day when I could send Micah to school! But for the last few years, even while eagerly awaiting sending him to school for Kindergarten and enjoying his two mornings a week at preschool, God has been tugging at my heart.

We began attending an amazing church just over three years ago. I quickly learned that a large number of families there homeschooled. I thought it was pretty awesome. But not for me. I knew homeschooled kids in college. My brother-in-law was also one. I've never thought it was weird. But I never thought it was for me. Me? Spend all day with my kids? Teach my kids? Ummm... no thanks.

Luke loved the idea. I was more hesitant. Way more so. But it didn't take long before I was becoming more and more fascinated. Fascinated but still planning to send my kids to school.

Micah started preschool last fall. I very much enjoyed the time he was gone, especially since when he started, I had a six week old. Micah loved school. Even so, as time went on, I just became more and more unsettled about sending him to school for several reasons. But the main one was that I just felt God's voice constantly telling me that I needed to homeschool.

So I started praying. "God, if you want me to homeschool, you need to make it crystal clear. And help me to be excited about it. Give me the desire. If this is what you want for us, give me the desire. But please don't let it be. Let him get into the charter school instead. I really don't want to do this. But whatever you want. If you want me to homeschool, you have some work to do on my heart." I wasn't really happy about it. But I prayed it anyway knowing full well He might actually change my heart. And hoping He wouldn't.

It wasn't long before I started becoming more open to the idea. I was talking to homeschool mamas and teens and adults who were/are homeschooled. I was spending hours after the kids went to bed looking at blogs and curriculum. I was watching documentaries. I was researching.

In the early spring I started to get excited about the possibility. Really excited.

Then I read this blog post by Erica where she shared her reasons for homeschooling. I love her blog and had been reading it for a while. But when I read this post, I believe in April, I just knew God was using her to speak to me. I hung on every word and nodded and cried in agreement with nearly everything she said, especially all the scripture references.

It was that night I knew God had answered my prayer. And not in the way I once had hoped He would. He truly changed my heart.

I was soon so excited about homeschooling that I was making plans to turn our office into a school room. I turned much of my blogging, FB and Words with Friends time into digging deeper into curriculum options and making plans.

We're starting with mostly Kindergarten and 1st grade curriculum even though Micah is only four. (He has a crazy love of learning and we already spend a lot of time reading, writing, spelling and doing math!!) I have no idea what grade or level to say he is. I guess I'll figure that out later. I have a lot to still figure out. I definitely have no clear picture of what this will look like or what I'm getting myself into here. But I'm not scared or anxious. I'm very excited!

As soon as I click the 'Checkout' button on two websites this afternoon or tomorrow, I'll officially consider myself a homeschooling mama.

And I couldn't be more at peace or happy about it.

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