So I put the thermometer away. And the OPKs. And the HPTs. And I haven't charted in two months or analyzed every bodily function or twinge. I have no idea what cycle day I'm on - something I've known every day of every cycle I've had in the last 5 years (with my little pregnancy and cancer hiatus, of course). I never thought those would be exciting things, but they are. It's so freeing not to be charting, scheduling, obsessing. It's a burden lifted. Relief! I'm not thrilled about it. I'm still sad. I still long for another baby and hopefully I'll have another one day... just not the way I pictured. But it's time to move on, to close that chapter, and I'm ready to do that.
I recently discovered that another RE clinic in town has an in-house embryo donation program, so I made an appt. to go there on Sept 3. It'll basically just be an informative appt, and I'm looking forward to it. While there, I will get a second opinion. I expect this new RE to say the same things as my current one. I'd be shocked if she didn't. I'm saying goodbye to this rollercoaster and ready to jump on another one. Not sure what it'll look like or how long it'll be, but I'm excited. And for now, I'm (mostly) enjoying my freedom before the next ride begins.
Good for you, Rebecca! I am glad you are just relaxing and giving yourself a much needed break. You deserve it! God will lead you where you need to be.
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