This will be the first of two posts. The next will come in the next few days.
As I referenced here, I’ve never been ‘good’ at patience. The last several years of my life have helped me to grow in this area, and I’ve been more patient than I’ve ever been before, but I still struggle sometimes with the concept of waiting and doing it patiently and with joy.
But time is not the enemy; in fact, I believe that time is our friend. I believe many times it’s through waiting that we grow, learn to trust God, and in my case, slowly learn to relinquish control.
In the adoption world it is more likely than not that when you are presented to a potential birth mom that you’re unaware of when that happens. I like that. Not knowing the day and time at which someone is viewing your profile or information in order to decide if she wants to choose you as the parents of the child she is carrying. But in some cases, you do know when you’re being considered due to a special situation or circumstance or simply because some attorneys or agencies do let you know.
Last Friday we were presented to an expectant mother. We’d learned of this situation just over a week prior and decided to ‘put our name in the pot’ and pursue this baby, a little girl due in July. We desired her and prayed for her to be ours. This girl was to view all the prospective adoptive couples’ information last Friday morning. I expected to be a wreck all day, but I prayed for God’s will to be done and peace for me and had a few friends and family praying as well.
And I had peace. Complete contentment and peace that I’d never experienced quite in that way. Truly that peace that passes all understanding.
Per the attorney working with this particular girl, we’d hear something as soon as possible, so I expected to know something by Friday afternoon. I didn’t. And I was ok with that even knowing it was a holiday weekend and it would likely be Tuesday before we knew anything.
But I was wrong. Saturday morning I woke up to an e-mail informing us that we had not been chosen. For about 10 seconds I was sad and disappointed, but then I just heard God’s voice – Rebecca, this isn’t your baby. I’m still at work here and will bring you your baby in MY time. And that’s all I needed (Luke, too). Didn’t get upset or shed a tear. This baby girl was simply not ours. I was completely and totally at peace, with peace that can only be from God, a peace that simply cannot be explained any other way.
I’m fully trusting in God’s provision and know He is orchestrating the most perfect plan for our family and will bring us the baby He wants to be a part of our family in His time. Utlimately, this journey, my life, not just adoption, is about Him and bringing glory to Him. And I know he will do more than I could ever imagine!
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:4-7 (Emphasis is mine.)
As I referenced here, I’ve never been ‘good’ at patience. The last several years of my life have helped me to grow in this area, and I’ve been more patient than I’ve ever been before, but I still struggle sometimes with the concept of waiting and doing it patiently and with joy.
But time is not the enemy; in fact, I believe that time is our friend. I believe many times it’s through waiting that we grow, learn to trust God, and in my case, slowly learn to relinquish control.
In the adoption world it is more likely than not that when you are presented to a potential birth mom that you’re unaware of when that happens. I like that. Not knowing the day and time at which someone is viewing your profile or information in order to decide if she wants to choose you as the parents of the child she is carrying. But in some cases, you do know when you’re being considered due to a special situation or circumstance or simply because some attorneys or agencies do let you know.
Last Friday we were presented to an expectant mother. We’d learned of this situation just over a week prior and decided to ‘put our name in the pot’ and pursue this baby, a little girl due in July. We desired her and prayed for her to be ours. This girl was to view all the prospective adoptive couples’ information last Friday morning. I expected to be a wreck all day, but I prayed for God’s will to be done and peace for me and had a few friends and family praying as well.
And I had peace. Complete contentment and peace that I’d never experienced quite in that way. Truly that peace that passes all understanding.
Per the attorney working with this particular girl, we’d hear something as soon as possible, so I expected to know something by Friday afternoon. I didn’t. And I was ok with that even knowing it was a holiday weekend and it would likely be Tuesday before we knew anything.
But I was wrong. Saturday morning I woke up to an e-mail informing us that we had not been chosen. For about 10 seconds I was sad and disappointed, but then I just heard God’s voice – Rebecca, this isn’t your baby. I’m still at work here and will bring you your baby in MY time. And that’s all I needed (Luke, too). Didn’t get upset or shed a tear. This baby girl was simply not ours. I was completely and totally at peace, with peace that can only be from God, a peace that simply cannot be explained any other way.
I’m fully trusting in God’s provision and know He is orchestrating the most perfect plan for our family and will bring us the baby He wants to be a part of our family in His time. Utlimately, this journey, my life, not just adoption, is about Him and bringing glory to Him. And I know he will do more than I could ever imagine!
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:4-7 (Emphasis is mine.)
beautiful post; thx for sharing
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